Darnivorous

Full disclosure: Just wanted to make clear that although this post suggests heteronormativity and even feeds a little bit into gender stereotypes, the core ideas here can be applied to a person of any gender and any sexual orientation.

“I don’t mean to brag but…” really means “I am here to brag, but I just want to preface what I’m about to say with being polite.”

So…

I don’t mean to brag but I’m pretty sure my boyfriend is damn near-perfect. This article is more or less a list of things that make my boyfriend “damn near-perfect,” and hopefully by sharing this you will be able to be (or find) a perfect boyfriend. And then your life will be complete. (more…)

i may not be perfect but you should embrace me for all that i am
- The title of the art project

The Art Project

The other day at work, one of my male coworkers put a blank white sheet of paper in front of me, handed me a permanent marker and told me to list the things that make me happy.  He asked for me to put down 10-15 things.

Music. Puppies. Eating a burger. Being with my boyfriend…

“No, no, no don’t put that, that’s something a girl would say. Write it as if you were me.” It felt a little weird to me because he told me that it was a homework assignment, so it seemed like he wanted me to do his homework for him.  I reluctantly listed the first 11 things that came to mind in less than five minutes. When I handed the sheet back to him, he crossed off “Puppies” and put “Dobermans” and crossed off “boyfriend” and replaced it with “ex-girlfriend.”

He came up to me later and asked me to help him with the same assignment. I refused. He tried to convince me by saying that it was an assignment for another female coworker. I didn’t believe him. (more…)

I mentioned in a previous post about some conversations I’ve been having with people about online and offline personas, specifically how much of what you do or who you are offline should you put online. Here are some of my findings: (more…)

A few weeks ago, Untemplater.com launched with a bang. One of the things we did was giveaway three seats (worth $497 each) to Josh Kaufman’s Personal MBA Crash Course. Not only was this an awesome prize, the responses we got from the readers who entered the contest were freakin’ ambitious, exciting, and very inspiring.

The questions were:

1. Where do you want to work in 2010? Why?
2. Where do you want to live in 2010? Why?
3. Who/what do you want to be in 2010? What do you want to focus on improving?
4. How do you plan on helping others untemplate their lives?

And so, with all this positive energy I got from reading the responses, I’ve decided to answer those same questions for my own personal growth and enjoyment. (more…)

I would really like to give a non-cryptic recap of 2009, but after much internal debate and Twitter conversations about online transparency (online vs. offline persona) it appears that I’m better off describing my year in general terms.

2009 was a good year. It was rocky at times and I did hit some really low lows, but overall a good year with many high highs to compensate. In the midst of an economic crisis, I managed to get a paid job and an unpaid internship. I met so many wonderful and interesting people. I learned more outside of the classroom than inside the classroom. I had great moments with friends and family. Most of all, I found friendship and love. (Awww, I kno rite?)

This year, I’m looking forward to many changes and challenges. I’ve written an incredibly long and daunting list of resolutions that is so daunting it’s almost discouraging.  Resolutions include goals to be more productive, be more fiscally responsible, practice healthy habits, and reconnect with friends. I’m going to budget my time and money, exercise and eat well, and all that cliche stuff. I even have a list to complete by my 23rd birthday.

Beneath all of it though, I have one main goal for the year: to discover my passion and live it.

I hope you have a wonderful new year.

I’ve joined forces with some of the awesomest, most smartest Gen-Y bloggers to bring you, dear world, a brand-spanking-new website called Untemplater. It’s a site for college students and recent graduates who are looking for inspiration to change up their careers and lifestyle. Topics range from starting your own business and personal finance, to living a mobile lifestyle and self-improvement.

I often get asked (and even more often I ask myself), “What are you going to do with your life?” Like many people my age, I have no idea whatsoever. Nada. None.  Untemplater goes through and offers some suggestions to answer this question for yourself, to consider the possibilities and realities of living an unconventional lifestyle–a lifestyle that you are in control of, that you are passionate about.

A great introduction to breaking the template is the Untemplater Manifesto ebook.  In it you’ll find case-studies of people (the Untemplater founders) who have broken the mold and are working hard to live the life they love. Although I don’t have a chapter in the book, you’ll see that my picture and bio is in it ’cause I’m an “incredibly helpful intern.”  It is truly a fantastic read; I highly recommend it, especially if you’re on the same ‘Confused-About-Where-Life-is-Going’ boat as I am.  You can download it for FREE here.

Then, once you’ve got an idea of what being an “untemplater” means, you can check out my very first post on the site. It’s quite obvious that I’m such a n00b.

And obviously, aside from visiting the site, you should definitely connect with Untemplater on Twitter and Facebook. If not connecting despite the great content available, you should at least join for the really really cool giveaways we’ll be having this week. They’re so cool, I’m almost tempted to rig the contests in my favor. Just kidding. Or…am I? To find out what those giveaways are, you’ll just have to keep up-to-date with Untemplater! And if the content and giveaways aren’t enough incentive, I should tell you that I’m the one supervising the Untemplater Twitter and Facebook Fan Page, as well as our LinkedIn group and Brazen Careerist network. So be there, or be a square….template!

Visit Untemplater.com!

Yeaaaah, that’s right. That is indeed a UCLA Deluxe Scentsy Warmer. Scentsy DOES have school spirit!

Just today, Scentsy announced the latest additions to their Campus Collection.  The schools listed below join the current collection with Brigham Young University, Boise State, and University of Utah.  Here is a list of the schools:

Due out January 2010:

• Oklahoma State University
• Texas A&M
• University of Washington
• University of Kansas
• Duke University

Due out February 2010:

• Florida State University
• Louisiana State University
• University of Missouri
• University of Colorado
• University of Idaho
• University of Montana
• UCLA

Special thanks to everyone who read my blog and tweets and voted over at Scentsy’s Fill The Stands website. We did it! Check out my Scentsy website for the latest products and scents.

One of the leaders of the Racebending movement published a post looking back on the past year since the casting for ‘The Last Airbender’ film was announced. She asks some reflection questions to the readers. Here are my answers…

What did you initially think of the casting?

When I first learned about the casting of ‘The Last Airbender’ film, I hadn’t seen a single episode of the Nickelodeon animated series it was based on.  Someone just told me that the series was heavily influenced by Asian culture, that the characters themselves had Asian or Inuit background and the live action adaptation casted Caucasian actors in all the lead roles.  My first impression was, “Oh God, it’s another ‘21.’“  It was just a movie to me, a movie that I would not see.  I didn’t think much beyond that until I learned about how prevalent this practice has been in Hollywood for years and years, and it is very different from how other characters and actors of color are treated.*

Any insights gained since then?

With Racebending, I feel like I’m learning something new everyday. Since I found out about the casting, I started regularly attending meetings with the Media Action Network for Asian Americans, helped lead (with my boyfriend) efforts to spread awareness at San Diego Comic-Con, revamp the Racebending website, protest outside of Paramount studios and more. I’ve attended more events centered around issues affecting the broader Asian American community.

My experience with Racebending has put me on a crash course in networking, event organizing, video creation and editing, web design.  In all this, I’ve learned that people have so many varying opinions, even those who support a single cause. I’ve learned that it’s foolish to live under the illusion that we are living in a post-racial world–many people believe in it, and usually those are the people who are privileged enough to not experience prejudice. I’ve learned that media is a very very powerful tool that those at the top don’t often realize the kind of power (and responsibility) they have to the viewing public. Money is the bottom line.

What has discussing the casting with friends been like?

Most people I talk to agree that ‘whitewashing’ a film is so pervasive in Hollywood, and that the casting of ‘The Last Airbender’ is unfortunate. Most people I talk to say that they will not watch the film. Most people I talk to are socially conscious and are understanding. And most people I talk to are busy working on issues like access to higher education, immigration, justice for Filipino veterans, poverty, etc. They’re not about to jump on this movement full force because there are other (more important) issues facing their communities.

What are you looking forward to for racebending.com next year?

Widespread and mainstream attention.  This movement is the biggest of its kind with an incredibly diverse group of supporters. I want to see big things. I want to make big things happen. Most of all, I want people to understand that even though we’re focusing most of our efforts on this single film, that it is only merely a single example of decades of fetishizing Asian culture through whitewashing, yellowfacing, stereotyping, and systematically barring Asian and Asian-American roles from Asian and Asian-American actors.

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* From Derek Kirk Kim’s blog:

“Or let me draw a closer parallel—imagine if someone had made a “fantasy” movie in which the entire world was built around African culture. Everyone is wearing ancient African clothes, African hats, eating traditional African food, writing in an African language, living in African homes, all encompassed in an African landscape…but everyone is white. How offensive, insulting, and disrespectful would that be toward Africans and African Americans? How much more offensive would it be if only the heroes were white and all the villians and background characters were African American?”

Over the years, I’ve googled myself many many times. Everyone has googled themselves.  If you haven’t, you really should.

Some people are lucky enough (or unlucky enough) to have a common name such that when they google themselves the posts about them are sprinkled in the first half-dozen pages. My name is quite unique, if I do say so myself. When you google my name, just about everything that comes up is really about me. This fact is equally awesome as it is terrifying.

I’ve been meeting a lot of people as of late and I decided last night to google myself again just to see what those people would see if they did a search. As usual I was embarrassed by the kinds of things that come up. So instead of leaving it alone for you to go discover for yourself, I’ve decided to entertain you with a list of my most interesting Google results. (more…)

BANANA Flyer

Last weekend I attended an event called BANANA,  the first-ever gathering of many Asian-American (and Canadian) bloggers.

Of course, many of the panelists at the event have posted their own recaps on their respective websites detailing the topics, networking, and drama.  Here’s a quick list of those posts:

• “The Bloggers League” by Jon Yang
• “Banana wasn’t just a gathering of Asian American Pacific Islander bloggers – it was a statement of solidarity, camaraderie and community” by Gil Asakawa of Nikkei View and Visualizasian.com
• “After the Banana: Reflections on the AsAm Blogosphere” by Erin at Hyphen Magazine
• “Banana Conference 2009″ at bigWOWO
• “Banana Peels” by Julie of Kimchi Mamas
• “Thoughts on BANANA Event from AArisings Perspective” by Nels of AArisings
• “Emily and Suzie’s fobulous adventures at BANANA” at Absolutely Fobulous
• “BANANA Recap by AzN” of BicoastalBitchin
• “BANANA Recap by CBruhs” of BicoastalBitchin
• “The Straw That Broke the Camel’s Back” by The Minority Militant

There are so many posts about it out there already written by far more established and eloquent writers, what more do I have to add to the conversation?

Well. If you look at the list above, most of the posts were written by panelist bloggers at the event. Some of those people came to event expecting something grand, others expecting nothing at all.  As a member of the small audience in that Taper Hall classroom on the campus I’m obligated to loathe the most, I came to the event after weeks of eager anticipation ready to soak up every piece of advice and every drop of knowledge. I was a dry sponge…figuratively, of course.

When the event began and Steve called upon the panelists, it seemed like half of the audience stood up and approached the stage. The panel consisted of representatives from various websites, of different backgrounds, and different passions.  With such a diverse panel, I genuinely feared for the spontaneous combustion of my brain.

The open forum portion of the event was a slight disappointment for me. It seemed to drag like there wasn’t a real purpose to the event. As it went on, I hoped that there would be something–some issue, topic, anything–that would ignite these incredible minds to speak passionately about what they know best. Then in the middle of the forum, an audience member spoke up about the kinds of questions being asked.  After that there were a few sparks including a discussion about gender issues in the AAPI community, the problem of fragmentation within the community, and the diverse growth of blog audiences. Just as the event was growing into something really meaningful, it was cut short.

At Q&A time, I was so there. I had taken lots of notes during the open forum and asked myself what kind of discussion I would like to see that I could only see from this particular group. Their audiences? Important issues? Offline action? Ultimately I decided I wanted to know what’s next.

What is the future of AAPI blogging and the AAPI community in general? What would they like to see in the future for blogging about/to/for the AAPI community?

Here are some of the things they wanted to see:

• Meet face to face with other bloggers and readers.
• Create better content (and show our strong voice).
• Integration within the AAPI community. As one of the panelists said, “Integration is necessary to become an activist community.”
• Use blogging as a tool for activism: hold community meetups, develop the offline community, have a political impact.
• More use of multimedia in the blogosphere. Let’s see more Asian faces on the interwebs.
• More collaboration between established (and upcoming) blogs. BANANA is the first step. What will be the next?
• Less blogs about celebrity culture (e.g. Jon & Kate).
• Have more diversity in the blogging community. An example of AAPI voices that go relatively unheard are from those living in areas that aren’t heavily populated by AAPIs. Empower people to blog; enable people to have their voice heard.

Despite its shortcomings, the BANANA event showed me that blogging and online media is more than some anonymous writers ranting about things that upset them.  It’s about challenging stereotypes, it’s about finding an audience for the voices that go unheard, and it’s for directing the passion fostered in online communities into offline action.  If the panelists’ visions listed above are any indication, BANANA feels like only the beginning of something even more spectacular to come. Let’s make those visions a reality. We need to take the next step.

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When introducing myself during the Q&A, I mentioned that I was informally representing Racebending.com. It is a prime example of people who have gathered around a single cause in an online community and are driving change offline.  I expected most people in the room to wonder what Racebending was. Instead, I got some smiles, nods and even cheers. My heart leaped out of my chest. Not only did some of these people know who we were; they supported us. They’ve heard our voice.

The last item listed above is the reason for this post. “Empower people to blog; enable people to have their voice heard.” I am just another voice, one that may or may not provide value to existing dialogue. We must remind ourselves that this is a journey, and we all have to begin somewhere right?